Mood: Jhené Aiko, 3:16 A.M.
Time: 23:14 Setting: my bed Current Netflix Binge Show: Girl Boss It has been a while since I have been back on this wonderful platform. Missed it a bit. i have been having some weird withdrawals and have felt such strong, unknown emotions. I feel antisocial and detached from a lot of my life. I am scared to get sucked back into the plethora of "fakeness." Semester at Sea really was in my opinion, social media rehab. It was a wake up call, that life exists outside of what device I hold in my hand. It was refreshing only being connected for spurts through crappy wifi in Ghana or India. The moment i got back, I got attacked with the question, what is next? These past four months were all about the present. i experienced so much, so quick. It was a slap in the face. A needed slap in the face. The stress I take on, the people I surround myself with, the actions I do, are all ME. All my decisions. I am surprised at how much I have grown up. It was a time of my life, where I really needed to self-reflect. The sad thing is, I needed to be stranded in the middle of the ocean, for me to reflect and talk to myself. I am scared of myself sometimes. I have cried more in these past two weeks, than I ever have in my life. It is unbelievable. Semester at Sea was a portal of vulnerability for me. Letting your guard down is hard and not having technology to defend yourself was crucial in my growth. Not knowing was okay, not being good at something was okay, not understanding was okay. Every so often, I smile and reminisce to how easy it was to talk to people on the ship. The conversations were boring at times, redundant at times, or even stupid. We would argue over what was better: tacos or burritos? The thing is, I could write a novel about each of my close friends on the ship, but my close friends off the ship, not nearly as much. How ridiculous is that? Snapchat has become concerts, drinking, and dogs. Instagram, a facade. Facebook, a link to every other account, inescapable. But hey, that is the world we live in. I am not mad, but I am disappointed that we choose the flashier or better option, instead of the simple, duller one. Impress me with how boring you are, not with that mask of rich bling. Evaluate yourself and your close friends. Judge your situation from a third person's POV. Or else you will never know.
0 Comments
a poem of sorts...
i am laying here shedding one tear at a time a time to be joyously celebrating my youth oh what an age 21 drinking, legality, freedom, rage, rebellion but a stale part of the cracker of my heart has let another grain of salt fall another youthful year gone my sadness stems from me growing uo dang today I even started using indicators topped off with my friends yelling "you drive like a grandma" i sit here wondering will every birthday be a funeral of my innoncence will every year going by be embraced with tears or will there be a time where I will be okay with the chaos the chaos storming my eyes and pounding another year of silence of fragility of being overlooked of being questioned of being underestimated this all began with a hes too good for you he will treat you right well i say fuck it and fuck me fuck me up good 21 cause this nasty girl is about to get nastier India has been such a fulfilling experience. I have loved every moment of it. India reminds me entirely of Pakistan, with its stray dogs, pani puri stands, tuk tuks, sweets, and masala smells. I also had the greatest opportunity to practice my Urdu, or Hindi. Everyone was shocked that I knew how to speak the language and were taken aback by knowledge and understanding. It was proud moment in my life. I felt that all the chats with my Grandma and watching Bollywood movies paid off. The most incredible moment would have to be seeing the Taj Mahal in real life. It was massive! Mumtaz was one lucky gal to have a tomb that large. It took 22 years to build and definitely is a masterpiece. The design and detail really makes it a wonder of the world. In addition, the food was endlessly amazing. I had a lot of VEG dishes, which is surprising because I consider myself a straight carnivore. Some of the delicacies include: dosa, sambar, idli, chole batura, paneer tikka masala, chicken 65, falooda, kulfis, papar, barbeque, chicken biryani, paneer naan, gulab jaman, sauf, banana lassi, etc. I spent a LOT of time eating. Loved very second! Lydia, one of my new travel buddies, also surprised us with two fabulous homestays! I had never done a homestay before, but I highly recommend. Kalpana Yoga Homestay was my favorite, the couple took care of us as if we were their children. We did yoga with Kalpana, the husband fed us aloo parathas in the morning, Mumta made us chai, her children practiced English with us, the rooms were massive, the Wifi was good, and there was a beautiful lab named Zara. What else could go wrong? Anyways, gotta run, have a 6 a.m. flight to Cochi tomorrow. Next stop, Mauritius!
Funny moments: - security guard broke a strap off a man's backpack - Lydia learning German whilst going to bed - Hoku getting bombarded with a water balloon by kids Highlights:
Lowlight:
So it is 12:36 a.m. and I am unable to sleep. A lot has happened in Vietnam so far. Yesterday, we went to the Cu Chi Tunnels. 12/10 would recommend. AMAZING experience. I met a Vietcong soldier who was in the tunnels for 12 years. When I crawled through a 20 m tunnel, I was drenched in sweat and was claustrophobic. I can't imagine what they did and how they lived in such a tight space. After that, I tried a cassava root (tapioca) dipped in peanut powder. Interesting, but a good starch. The powder was A+. The program was with SAS. I am unsure if I liked that vibe, it was way too touristy- take a 3 hour bus ride, go pro everything, and then take a bus back. But I am still very thankful.
So today, my crew and I set out for Can Tho. We hit up Highland Coffee, for some WIFI and Vietnamese coffee. I can literally drink it 25/7. Then we planned our trip to Can Tho. We took a 3 hour bus ride there. I bonded with Allie Kingston, the "mom" of our group, SO KIND. I got some fresh corn on the pitstop. It was a beautiful scenic route. However, one thing that occurred was our accident. I was destroyed. My head still hurts and I think I have a concussion. This occurred when our group split up. We had to get into two separate taxis because there was 7 of us. Our taxi followed the other one, but five minutes into the ride we lost the other car. Everything was fine until, bam we got rear ended hard by a truck. I was shook. I had no idea what was going on. i saw my life flash before my eyes. I felt trapped. CRAZY. Hoku and I held each other for a solid minute. And then I tried to open my door. I was stuck, Lindsey got out immediately, her air bag went off and she crawled out. Hoku and I climbed over the front seat, and pushed our bags out. We were moving like slugs, unaware of what had happened. I was in shock. Lindsey then collapsed out of dehydration. Honestly, I am proud that we made it to our hostel okay. Love you all. sorry this is a very short note about how much i love japan
and will be messy, i do not want to get dock time but japan has the kindest, cleanest, and most efficient culture i have EVER seen i am amazed and blown away for instance, no trashcans on the street, because you must not eat and walk/ the trash you have is yours and yours alone and you must dispose of it in your home the hot springs was the highlight of my trip, 4095 yen, SO CHEAP. it was in a local area and then we had the best ramen in a literal hole in the wall, or what i like to say home in the wall the amount of mochi, rice and pastries i have consumed is crazy! the amount of delicacies OH MY LORD. i went to osaka, and then tokyo for two nights and then kyoto and then TODAY kobe. |
AuthorNabiha Jiwani Archives
March 2017
Categories |